It's easy to know what matters to you when everything is going well, but it’s much harder when you're facing resistance. You may be questioning your confidence. You may be the newest voice in the room, or maybe you look different. Perhaps a decision hasn't gone your way. What if creating the change you care about suddenly feels much harder than you imagined? At times like these, it's worth going back to the evidence.
During six years coaching emerging leaders on fast-track leadership programmes, I watched people navigate high expectations (their own and other people's), uncertainty and long-established cultures. The people who seemed most able to navigate these challenges weren't necessarily those with all the answers, or those who were the smartest or the most confident. They were often the people who hadn't lost sight of why they were there.
What's the evidence for your Why?
Your Why isn't always the first answer that comes to mind. The surface-level explanation might be “I want to help people”, “I want to make a difference” or “I want a meaningful career.” Whilst these may be valid, they may only be the starting point. Like any good investigation, it can be worth looking beyond what you think you know. What experiences shaped that motivation? What keeps drawing you towards certain people, problems or environments? What values are underneath it? What strengths keep appearing in the evidence? What frustrates you enough to want to act? Sometimes the most revealing clues are hidden in the patterns we take for granted. Your true Why may be something you need to uncover, and sometimes the best evidence to guide your future direction is hidden in the story of how you got here.
Working with detectives at different ranks across county forces and London's Metropolitan Police, I saw the difference that connection to purpose can make. From someone's first weeks in the job to an established career, your Why can influence much more than career direction. It can shape resilience, performance, impact, wellbeing and how you respond when the environment around you becomes difficult. As a coach at Police Now, I worked with emerging detective leaders, and emerging role models in society. We explored identity, self-awareness and motivation. For some individuals, that also meant navigating family, friends or communities questioning their career choice, particularly people from backgrounds historically underrepresented in policing who were stepping forward to serve and represent diverse communities.
Consider the phrase below, and what this means to you.
When the voices around you become loud, knowing your own evidence matters.
One idea to investigate
Your Why can become an anchor when the path ahead, in life or work, isn't straightforward. Although it won't remove uncertainty or resistance, knowing what matters can help you decide what's worth pursuing, what you might need to let go of and when it's important to find the perseverance to keep going.
One question to consider
What matters enough to you that you're prepared to keep showing up for it when things become difficult?
One practical way to apply it
Think about one challenge you're navigating right now and before asking “What should I do?”, open a different line of enquiry. Your answers may not solve the case, but they might give you your bearings.
Why does this matter to me?
What am I trying to change or contribute?
How do I want to show up while doing it?
Am I a reflection of the person I want to be?
A question from the Detective Coach
When everything around you seems to be encouraging you to change direction, what helps you know which part of yourself shouldn't change?
Further inspiration: Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance — Angela Duckworth